Yesterday a stick of butter melted all over the stovetop. I’d left it there after preparing some roasted sweet potato with kerrygold and salt.
Lo and behold, my dear unsuspecting housemate turned the oven on to bake some fishsticks and didn’t see the stick of butter there.
Ten minutes later and…bluuuuuurrrrb.
The butter ended up in a liquid coating all over the surface of the stove!
I came downstairs to the scene and exclaimed, ‘What happened?!’
To which my housemate responded ‘ You left the butter there’
And then I rebuttled, ‘ But you turned the oven on without moving it.’
In which he responded, ‘yes but you didnt clean up the butter in the first place’
Here we were, in the midst of a blame game over a brand new package of Kerrygold.
Needless to say, there was a mini distortion of energy, and as I walked away and sat on the porch for a moment I took a breathe, and then another….and slowly another…and then another.
I stopped to feel, and listen to my higher guidance.
And then I realized that there was no need to blame. It happened. We all had our part to play.
Is it worth it to prove my point? Let’s embrace and pivot.
I haven’t been wanting to eat dairy anyways. It gives me a bellyache. I bought it with food stamps. We have more butter. Plus, he had to clean up the entire stovetop until it was sparkling, which really needed to be done anyways, and took effort and showed he cared about it.Bonus! Embrace and Pivot. Learn to breathe through and break the karmic cycle of blame.
Our limitation protected us.
It’s okay. There’s no need to cry over spilt butter.
It got me wondering though…
Why do we humans blame? Is it an attempt to cease ongoing cycles of hurt by placing the responsibility on one person alone?
This story isn’t just about the butter on the stove.
This is ending centuries if not millenia of blame as a tool for seizing wealth and control.
As I sit in silence at the altar and further meditate on blame, my inner sight sees memories of witch trials and times when women were told they were demonically possessed, evil, and tainted for their knowledge of herbal butters, of medicine, midwifery, and overall outspokeness.
Women over millenia who have been blamed for the uncomfortable feelings of men and of others. Medicine Women mummified in peat bogs with butter buried all over Europe, entombed with ancient wisdom often forgotten by we descendents.
What is it about the presence of a woman in their power that is so threatening to mankind? Is it because it reminds their accusers of their inability to blame them, to compete with them or control them when they see a woman living on the land, foraging and tending to her garden, making love and having children, teaching her children the same earth wise ways in the bliss of the earth’s knowledge which is our birthright ?
White European colonizers came to the shores of Turtle Island with stories of Adam and Eve having long forgotten how to be indigenous due to crusaders and previous witch burnings in their homelands.
The story of Eve as temptress and Lilith as demon led to a deeply seeded inherent belief that women were fallen, to be controlled, not to be trusted, to be tamed and controlled.
Women teachers, doctors, mathematicians, midwifes, storytellers, dancers, musicians and weavers were silenced, blamed and scapegoated so that their wealth and lands could be seized by the powers that wannabe to secure the first banks and establish a new governance.
The witch trials in the 1620s on Turtle Island/ Occupied Amerikkka occurred on a land of sovereign women, who’s children could be proved without a doubt to be inheritors of land because of the nature of reproduction. Women landholders were slain and their families charged with the remaining costs of the trial so that these families would be moved into a position of servitude and ruling families of Europe could take charge.
Not only were lands being seized by Native people but they were being seized by free Europeans who were looking for a life of liberty in the wild in harmony with local indigenous tribes. In fact there’s proof that Europeans, Native Indigenous peoples and African skilled laborers all lived together in the 1400’s and 1500’s in many innovative ways.
It wasn’t until the Templars arrived to claim these lands on behalf of the old ruling families, war broke out, and all hell broke lose in the spriitual war of the ‘Amerikkkas’.
And with this, the loss of many medicine women landtenders who’s descendents were left indebted, in poverty, and dependent on the same ruling families that oppressed them!!!
It’s fucked really.
As a living descendent of Sarah Goode Sovereign and her sisters who were unjustly slain by the hands of fearful men in the Salem Witch Trials of 1692, I hereby renounce the blame cast upon myself and ancestors for the uncomfortable feelings I stir up as I stand in the light of truth in her story. Her death and the torture of her sisters casts deep shadows in the history of this land and how the current ruling class stole the throne of the Amerikkkas.
And these greater stories are where these karmic cycle often begin in the small moments of blame in the kitchen over a stick of butter.
It was a trickster spirit ploy to take resources away from others through the guise of spiritual and moral superiority, for the powers that wannabe know the strength of belief and how much it can truly weaves the lattice of thought and action in this world.
Anyways, Blame is subtle. It’s more than just historical. It’s a key piece to secure attachment in relational alchemy.
So while we’re at it, since we’ve come this far in our time together, may we also renounce all blame we’ve cast on others as being the source of our problems when indeed it is OUR responsibility to take each step wisely and to be able to respond accordingly.
Let’s not believe the hype when others rally to blame another for the source of their stress. We can’t fix other people. Only inspire them through modeling behavior ourselves. Only accept them for who they are, and believe them when they show you their true nature.
Let’s not blame ourselves. Let’s love ourselves. Be our own best friend. Would you blame your best friend? No. You’d reassure them that they’re doing their best.
We live too much in potentiality and aspiration, not enough time in the present with what is and nurturing that to grow. Living in enoughness. We live too much in the influence of others and their expectations and approvals, in my opinion. How do we prioritize our direct connection with the river of divine energy that is always flowing in us and around us?
And when we’re in that space, can we accept responsibility for our faults without punishment or judgement? Can we can forgive ourselves fully so we no longer feel the need to attribute our pain to another’s doing or to ourselves or to circumstances out of our control?
How do we hold others accountable with compassion and empathy so all can result in wellness? With healthy loving communication and clear boundaries, we can address and attribute our responsiblities with care and knowing it’s safe to fuck up.
It’s safe to be imperfect. It’s safe to take however much time you need to take care of yourself. But you have to lead that. And not blame yourself for why you’re not ‘there’ yet.
(Like ‘there’ is somewhere we ever get?!lol)
We have a choice. It is our choice as to what we do with how we’re feeling inside.
As life stressors increase we often blame the people closest to us for our own distress.
But remember, we’re all doing the blessed we can. We all just wanna hang out, love and be loved at our core.
Sow do we end this cycle of blame?
One of the first steps is self love. Acceptance. Forgiveness aka ‘Flow Give This’.
Many of us our hurting because we’re not taking care of ourselves in fundamental ways that would increase our adaptability and resilience.
Our addictions serve us in important ways, and we also know how much better we’d feel to be free from them. May we summon our bravery to take those uncomfortable steps to pattern interrupt. To walk through the fire of withdrawals and discomfort knowing that on the other end is liberation.
It’s not our faults that we’re addicted. Let’s not blame ourselves or the medicines we rely on for why the relationship has become unconscious and irresistible. We’re human.
Let’s lean in and thank the substances fully that we’re addicted to. Speak to them directly and say thank you for the ways they support us.
Then, let’s speak to them what we feel life would be like without them, how we’d like to feel, and the ways in which this substance or habit may be limiting that.
Find a symbolic way to release into the water, into the air, into the fire, or the earth, with offerings of roses or other petals, leaves or incenses.
Release with love, reverence and care, and most importantly FREE FROM BLAME.
May we choose generosity instead of grasping in miserly greed. May we choose Restoration rather than Punishment. Accountability rather than Blame.
May we be freed from these karmic cycles for ourselves and the generations behind and before us.
For Whatever Is, Is.
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✨💥✨
